Thursday, September 13, 2012

We Have Lift Off!

This weekend I will embark on a new mission.  I will launch my career as a Pro-life speaker.  I never saw this coming from 5 years ago. Who'd have guessed I'd write a book and want to get involved in all the hullabaloo.  As I sit in a hotel lobby, I realize I can't step back from the launching pad. We are all systems go.  The countdown is on.  I will sign in tomorrow at Together For Adoption's National Conference and take my name badge entitled 'Brittany Hudson' Executive Director for The Vessel -For Life and Speaker. 

What on earth possessed me to take on such an endeavor?  It wasn't part of my initial plan at first. I just wanted to write a book and let that be that but as I started looking into the writing world,  I realized that there was so much more to making a statement than penning some pages.  The privilege of author takes a commitment to building a platform.  I got it, you need to be out there promoting your message in order to sell books but what was my message other than sharing my testimony?

I had such a profound experience with my adoption that I never slowed down enough to consider that others might me a lot less fortunate than me.  As I researched blogs written by other birthmothers it became clear, I was not so much the norm as the exception as far as the bloggers out there.  What a hole in my heart, my tears poured through as I read the stories of birthmothers who'd felt coerced, lied to, rejected, dismissed and left to suffer to the scoffing of a public that wanted them to keep quiet and tow the company line, should anyone care to ask.  It shouldn't surprise anyone that as I made myself know out there on Planet Internet that my very experience would make their skin wrinkle.  Obviously I was a religious delusional who'd not been made aware of my harsh reality, poor dear. 
I expected to be embraced by my newly found nation only to be rejected and rather unceremoniously.

So what was different about me?  Why was I doing so well when others suffered seemingly endless grief and loss?  The answer is clear to me.  I understand that my adoption story had amazing purpose.  It was ordained by my Creator, loving handed to me to carry out and I chose to respectfully and reverently bow my knee and take my assignment. 

Do I feel any pain in my adoption even today?  Of course I do.  I pain for my daughters who unwillingly take my choices on as part of their lives.  I regret that they may grieve because of me.  I have times of reflection where I wish this wasn't part of my life, because it isn't easy to live with this story you see. 

I get up every day with a commitment to honor my life assignment. I use my pain to bring hope and healing to others but I am not the message. I am the messenger sent by the only one who can make something like this whole.  Jesus is the Healer and I get to bring His love to every woman and unborn child I touch.  I would cry a river every day to share in the joy for 10 minutes that I have with these woman when they understand that this time, even for the first time, someone loves them unconditionally.  I get to let God's love pour out of me and into the hearts of these beautiful people.  What a joy it is to serve!

Together for Adoption's National Conference will focus on the reality that every adoption involves suffering. The joy that comes through it is promised in James 1:1-4.  Read it and may you understand, what He promises is what is gained in the trial.  If you can't join me at the conference this weekend, please pray for me as I share my story and the ministry's vision for how I bring healing and what needs to be done for better aftercare for women who have placed.  Launch will commence in T-Minus 12 hours...

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